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The most important project we will undertake — getting to know who we really are. Who are you? What drives you? What ideas or beliefs do you carry that are not your own? How can we undertake self-care without knowing ourselves?
I am reminded of a quote by the Ayn Rand
“To say “I love you” one must know first how to say the “I”.
Many therapists suggest that self-awareness is the key to better mental health. Self-awareness can be defined simply as being in touch with triggers in our body in response to situations and people. The focus is internal vs. external. How to become more self-aware
The most important project we will undertake — getting to know who we really are. Who are you? What drives you? What ideas or beliefs do you carry that are not your own? How can we undertake self-care without knowing ourselves?
I am reminded of a quote by Ayn Rand — “To say “I love you” one must know first how to say the “I”.
Many therapists suggest that self-awareness is the key to better mental health. Self-awareness can be defined simply as being in touch with how we are feeling inside, in our body, what triggers certain challenging emotions in us, and what triggers more balanced and peaceful emotions.
So, how can we get better acquainted with our own selves?
Let’s discuss 4 practices that can help us start this inquiry —
Who Am I?
‘Waste’ some time
If you did not have to be productive and did not have to-do lists —
What would you spend your time on? What articles would you read? What topics would you research? What kind of activities would you want to do?
I am not talking about mindless internet scrolling or tv marathons. I am referring to things you get so engrossed in that you lose track of time. Activities or topics that send you in a state of flow.
My partner, who was a finance guy and economics major from an ivy league college, discovered his flow when he realized he could code for 8 hrs a day. He turned this information into a career change from a happy Vice President at Wall Street to a very happy Software Developer. He would have never transitioned towards a happier career had he not allowed himself to ‘waste’ some time.
Work with a therapist or coach
A therapist or life coach offers a non-judgmental and compassionate space to really examine ourselves.
Why do we feel the way we do? Why do we make decisions the way we do? What are we scared of? What patterns in our life do not serve us and need to change? What are your true core values and are you aligned with them in your daily actions?
With the help of a therapist or coach, you can start exploring constructive tools that are custom for you and can help you lead a life that is in alignment with you.
Working with a therapist or life coach can be especially useful as a first step because they can be your partner in this self-awareness journey. For example, it was in these coaching and therapy sessions that I recognized my passion for wellness and went on to study reiki, Ayurveda, and meditation.
Journal
Ernest Hemingway said —
write hard and clear about what hurts.
Sounds morose but has a lot of meat in that statement. Research done at UCLA shows that journaling can improve cognitive function and help manage anxiety.
I personally recommend free-form journaling, which is basically writing with abandon and in a state of uninhibition as if no one is reading.
It's like having a conversation with myself on paper and it is a very powerful tool to dig and bring to awareness experiences, memories, and desires that I might be hidden by daily busyness.
That is useful data! Input into how you want to shape the next few days, months, and years of your life.
Meditate
If I want to become more self-aware, I have to be able to listen to the self. In this loud and busy world, intentional silence is the key way to achieve that
Meditation is not magic and you will not walk away with a calm mind after every session. However, it is one of the primary ways that will allow you to listen to your own voice.
I know that the idea of meditating can seem daunting so I want to share some resources. You can look up Tara Brach’s meditations online, or you can check out the Waking Up app that has an intro to meditation course.
I am a trained meditation and mindfulness teacher so if you need any support starting your meditation practice, shoot me a message by contacting me through my website — www.deeplysimple.info
I also want to acknowledge that everyone’s season in life looks different. You might have responsibilities that take up a lot of your time. This quest of self-awareness is not meant to be another to-do on your list, but rather a gentle nudge.
Can you take out an hour a week for therapy? Can you sit silently on your commute for 5 min? Can you take out 5 min on a Sunday evening to journal?
Simple, small steps, taken consistently.
I hope you found this content useful. I have more podcast episodes that break down wellness concepts into easy-to-understand habits. Get in touch with me at www.deeplysimple.info. I would love to hear what other wellness topics you are interested to dive deeper.
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